Last Wednesday I drove up to St. Louis (about 4 hour drive) for a Reiki session with Nancy Stenn. What I experienced was phenomenal! My husband told me I shouldn't tell people about this experience, because they might think I am crazy, and I realize that people who haven't been exposed to these kinds of energies might think that. But some of these same people believe that contact with Angelic Energy happened in olden times, and the stories in the Bible are true. What makes us think that we still don't have such experiences?
Nancy and I had connected on the phone a few weeks ago, so I was very excited to be in her physical presence. Nancy had told me on the phone that she works with "Angelic Reiki," and angelic beings would come into the room with her, and she sometimes just watches them as they do their work with the person she is working on.
She put me totally at ease. I lay down on a massage table and closed my eyes, not really knowing what to expect, and trying not to have any expectations--like Dr. Pearl recommends in his book. I just felt open to whatever might happen.
The first thing I noticed was warm hands on my center (hara, or one-point--about 2 inches below the navel). Then I realized that Nancy had moved to a new location, but I could still feel the pressure and warmth of the hands! I felt my feet being held by warm, gentle, but firm pressure, but Nancy was at my head! Then I felt vibrating energy moving down my arms and out my hands--much like the Pranic Healing energy I have worked with before, only much stronger. I then went into a deep meditation, and don't remember much, except that I was very aware of multiple hands on my body, not just Nancy's. When the session ended, it seemed like only a short time had passed, but I think it was over an hour.
I related to her what I had felt, and she asked if it felt like the hands holding me were masculine or feminine energy. I said it felt like masculine. She smiled and nodded, then she told me the most fantastic tale of HER experience in working with me.
She said that Jesus walked into the room first thing, and He was working with me most of the time. She is not a Christian herself, so she was rather surprised, and she said this is only the second time Jesus has come to a healing that she is doing. Other beings were Uriel (the Archangel of Light), and (I think she said) Rafael, and also Michael. She usually has Michael energy helping her when she does this work. She said at one point Jesus was putting a golden-white light onto my "upper right quadrant" and down my right arm to below the elbow. While He did this, she felt the need to ground my feet--so she was holding my feet, and felt like she would have been toppled over by the energy if Michael hadn't been behind her holding her. Then the Angeles did a scan of my body, stopping at places that needed clearing, and they made a "cross-hatch" pattern over those places. The lower part of my body didn't need anything, but the upper part did.
As Nancy was telling me all this, I felt very grateful, as well as a little incredulous, but since then I have realized that these energies (of the Archangels and Jesus) made some deep changes in my being. I think I know why Jesus showed up right away. I attracted him by my desire, (Law of Attraction) that had been expressed in a song I wrote many years ago. The song starts out "The healing love of Jesus Christ is filling my body, is filling my mind." Of course Jesus would come to me!
The next day I met with Nancy again and asked her a few more questions. As we were speaking, she stopped a moment, and said she had a message to give me: "Never fear. You are well-attended on this journey." I know this is true.
One interesting thing happened after I left the center where I had worked with Nancy: it was almost 5 PM, rush-hour traffic, in the midst of St. Louis! I had my GPS system on to direct me to my daughter's house, and as I was driving through the heavy traffic, I felt NO anxiety at all! Usually such a circumstance would elicit a lot of angst in me. I felt like I was "in the flow" of the universe. I was being directed; I was not alone. I finished the evening with a delightful visit with my storytelling friend Mary Garrett.
I have rewritten the old song that summoned Jesus, and it gives me great comfort to sing it. I am not fearful; I know I am well-attended on this journey!
If you are interested in contacting Nancy, her web site is: www.lucidhealing.com.
Monday, January 26, 2009
Connecting With Source Energy
The main direction my healing is taking now is working with my thoughts and feelings, as well as getting help and direction from healers who work on the energetic field.
I went for a second session with Chad in Springfield, who does the Reconnection work Dr. Eric Pearl writes about in his book. Although I didn't have any fantastic dreams that night (as I had after my first session), I felt very energized and peaceful afterwards. I know that this work is helping me connect with my Source Energy.
I have also been listening to the Abraham tapes (channeled by Esther Hicks) about the Law of Attraction, as well as working with the book, (channeled by Abraham) Ask, and It is Given.
Abraham speaks of the stream of Well-Being that flows to us all the time. When we have troubles in our lives, it is because we pinch off that stream, and don't allow it in. In order to create our lives consciously, we need to be aware of the thoughts and beliefs that keep us from realizing the life that we want. This gets tricky, because if we desire something, and we realize that we don't have it, the Law of Attraction brings both things into our lives--the realization that we don't have it is as powerful an attractor as the desire to have it!
So, what I've been working with in my healing is letting in the stream of Well-Being energy, and keeping my desire (for health) to be foremost in my thoughts. When I find myself slipping into a fear-based place about the cancer, I switch to an affirmation of my health. I'm using the song I wrote: "I am a beloved Child of God, and I am in Perfect Health." I state this affirmation very often throughout the day. When I meet people and they ask how I am, I say, "I am in perfect health." This statement FEELS true (I have been feeling fantastic!), and I feel very happy when I say it. Abraham says that our emotions are our gauge for how well we are letting in the Source Energy.
I had a little experience today that demonstrated to me how powerful this idea is. I had a dental appointment for a cleaning. I've always had very sensitive teeth, and even cleaning has been uncomfortable for me. However, Abraham says that if we experience pain, it is our "gauge" that we are not connecting to Source Energy--we are resisting its flow. So, I decided I would think only positive thoughts about the teeth cleaning experience. I started by feeling deep appreciation for the technician who was doing the cleaning--how wonderful it is that these people are willing to clean our teeth to keep them healthy! Then as she was working, I kept this thought running through my head: "I allow Source Energy to flow through me, contributing to my Well-Being." I felt NO PAIN at all during the cleaning! This is a first for me!
In the book, Ask and It is Given," Abraham says that the length of time it takes for a total healing to take place depends on the mix of thoughts one holds. I know I still have mixed thoughts: maybe the doctors are right--I'll need to have surgery to get this lump out of my breast; my friend Holly tried to heal herself through Christian Science thought, and she wasted away and died; I'm deluding myself--it is impossible to get rid of cancer without medical intervention; etc. On the other hand, I am feeling very positive about the direction my healing is taking. I know that others have achieved "spontaneous remissions" that puzzled their doctors (I think they just really connected to Source Energy!). The supplements I'm taking have healed others from breast cancer. The lumps are shrinking in size! I have Energetic Beings who are assisting me in healing. (See the next post). I'm feeling joyous and energetic, and I feel connected to Source Energy! I have stopped focusing on the lump in my breast (is it gone yet?), and just relaxing and knowing that as I continue to connect to the Source (God) that I will become totally healthy. I am totally healthy NOW.
There is a study group that is working with the Abraham material, and I feel like I'm taking to it like a duck to water! This makes so much sense to me--stuff that I've read about before is coming into focus for me in a very real way. I am SO appreciative for the Abraham material!
I went for a second session with Chad in Springfield, who does the Reconnection work Dr. Eric Pearl writes about in his book. Although I didn't have any fantastic dreams that night (as I had after my first session), I felt very energized and peaceful afterwards. I know that this work is helping me connect with my Source Energy.
I have also been listening to the Abraham tapes (channeled by Esther Hicks) about the Law of Attraction, as well as working with the book, (channeled by Abraham) Ask, and It is Given.
Abraham speaks of the stream of Well-Being that flows to us all the time. When we have troubles in our lives, it is because we pinch off that stream, and don't allow it in. In order to create our lives consciously, we need to be aware of the thoughts and beliefs that keep us from realizing the life that we want. This gets tricky, because if we desire something, and we realize that we don't have it, the Law of Attraction brings both things into our lives--the realization that we don't have it is as powerful an attractor as the desire to have it!
So, what I've been working with in my healing is letting in the stream of Well-Being energy, and keeping my desire (for health) to be foremost in my thoughts. When I find myself slipping into a fear-based place about the cancer, I switch to an affirmation of my health. I'm using the song I wrote: "I am a beloved Child of God, and I am in Perfect Health." I state this affirmation very often throughout the day. When I meet people and they ask how I am, I say, "I am in perfect health." This statement FEELS true (I have been feeling fantastic!), and I feel very happy when I say it. Abraham says that our emotions are our gauge for how well we are letting in the Source Energy.
I had a little experience today that demonstrated to me how powerful this idea is. I had a dental appointment for a cleaning. I've always had very sensitive teeth, and even cleaning has been uncomfortable for me. However, Abraham says that if we experience pain, it is our "gauge" that we are not connecting to Source Energy--we are resisting its flow. So, I decided I would think only positive thoughts about the teeth cleaning experience. I started by feeling deep appreciation for the technician who was doing the cleaning--how wonderful it is that these people are willing to clean our teeth to keep them healthy! Then as she was working, I kept this thought running through my head: "I allow Source Energy to flow through me, contributing to my Well-Being." I felt NO PAIN at all during the cleaning! This is a first for me!
In the book, Ask and It is Given," Abraham says that the length of time it takes for a total healing to take place depends on the mix of thoughts one holds. I know I still have mixed thoughts: maybe the doctors are right--I'll need to have surgery to get this lump out of my breast; my friend Holly tried to heal herself through Christian Science thought, and she wasted away and died; I'm deluding myself--it is impossible to get rid of cancer without medical intervention; etc. On the other hand, I am feeling very positive about the direction my healing is taking. I know that others have achieved "spontaneous remissions" that puzzled their doctors (I think they just really connected to Source Energy!). The supplements I'm taking have healed others from breast cancer. The lumps are shrinking in size! I have Energetic Beings who are assisting me in healing. (See the next post). I'm feeling joyous and energetic, and I feel connected to Source Energy! I have stopped focusing on the lump in my breast (is it gone yet?), and just relaxing and knowing that as I continue to connect to the Source (God) that I will become totally healthy. I am totally healthy NOW.
There is a study group that is working with the Abraham material, and I feel like I'm taking to it like a duck to water! This makes so much sense to me--stuff that I've read about before is coming into focus for me in a very real way. I am SO appreciative for the Abraham material!
A New Era of Hope
It has been almost two weeks since I last wrote, and so much has happened during that time. I have composed several posts in my head, but just didn't have time to sit down and type them in. Some have to do with my healing journey, and some are just things that are happening in my life. I'd like to start with my thoughts and feelings about our new president!
A Teary-Eyed Day!
'Tis a gift to be simple, 'tis a gift to be free,
'Tis a gift to come down where we ought to be;
And when we find ourselves in the place just right,
It will be in the valley of love and delight.
When true simplicity is gained,
To bow and to bend we shan't be ashamed.
To turn, to turn, it will be out delight,
Til by turning and turning we come round right.
What a joy it was to hear this old Shaker hymn played by the quartet, braving the nippy breeze at the Presidential Inauguration! This particular piece of music means a lot to me. My singing partner Dale and I used to perform it in 1968. Later, in 1996, I sang it over and over to my unborn baby to get her to turn in the womb so she could "come round right." (It worked!)
My eyes teared up many times before, during, and after the Inauguration. I noticed that my tears joined the other tears of the millions of people in the crowd in Washington D.C., and of the millions of people across our land. Not only have we elected a man who I feel has the utmost integrity and love for humankind, but he is a man of color!
I was in elementary school in the 1950's, and I remember when our school in Joplin, MO was integrated. I remember watching on our black and white TV the news of little black children bravely going to school, and being taunted by horrible words and violent threats. Although I was young, I knew how courageous those children were.
My parents had always taught us that all humans were created equal, and the color of one's skin had nothing to to with one's value as a human being. My father owned an automotive parts store in Joplin, and he would frequently go on coffee breaks to a little coffee shop across the street from his store. One day, a black man came in and sat down to get some coffee and a donut. The owner of the coffee shop told him he couldn't sit there; he would give him his coffee and donut to go. My father immediately got up, leaving his food at the counter, and he said, "If you won't serve this man at the counter, then you will not serve me either. I will never be back." He never returned.
My older sister Mary got a job as a waitress at a little cafe on Main Street. She was so excited; it was her very first job. She practiced at home carrying armloads of plates, carefully balancing them so she could learn to bring the food out to her customers. The rest of the family went on a vacation to Colorado, leaving Mary in Joplin so she could work. When we returned home, we were shocked to find that Mary had been fired after only a few days on the job. Why? A black customer had come in and sat down, and she served him. The manager told her to give the customer his food in a sack, and she refused.
When I met Dale, my singing partner, we hit it off immediately. We started singing together at a party we both happened to be at, and we thrilled to the beautiful harmonies we were able to make together. It was like we were on the same wave length. Working out pieces to perform together was so easy! One thing led to another, and soon we were dating as well as singing together. Dale was a very handsome, tall, slender black man with a beautiful voice. The movie "Guess Who's Coming to Dinner" about a bi-racial couple came out about that time, and we relished that we mirrored the plot of the movie somewhat as I took Dale home to meet my parents. I knew that my parents would welcome him with open arms, and they did. Some of my other relatives would not. I had heard some of the racial jokes and slurs coming from some of my aunts and uncles and cousins. But I didn't let any of their comments (or potential comments) bother me. I loved Dale. We made beautiful music together. That was all that mattered. Dale's family was likewise gracious in welcoming me.
Our break-up came not because of racial issues, but other little things that come up when a couple becomes close. Dale decided he wanted to date some other women. While he was trying out some other relationships, I met a man and fell head-over-heels in love with him. The new man became my husband. During the eleven months that I dated Dale, I came to feel a deep committment to the Civil Rights Movement. Dale had trouble finding apartments because of his color. In Parsons, Kansas, where he was completing an internship as a music therapist, he had to bribe the landlady by offering her double the amount she usually got for the apartment! A nosy neighbor noticed Dale coming and going from my apartment in Pittsburg, and complained to my landlady, thinking she had rented to a black man. I had to move.
So, last Tuesday, when our country accepted an African-American as President, I cried! I cried for all the people like my father and sister who stood up for what was right. I cried for all the people who refused to step to the back of the bus, and who courageously went to school despite the taunts and danger. I cried for people like Dale who had to pay twice the going rate for an apartment just because of the color of his skin. I cried for the innocent people who lost their lives, like the four little girls in the church in Burmingham, Alabama, and Medgar Evers, and Martin Luther King. I know that the fight for true civil rights is not over; there are still a lot of angry people who still don't "get it," that we are all children of God, and as children of God, we are all brothers and sisters. But when I saw the millions of people in Washington with tears streaming down their faces, smiling and waving, I knew that the tide has turned.
One song that I sang many times over the years is "We Shall Overcome." and we can now sing, "We Have Overcome."
A Teary-Eyed Day!
'Tis a gift to be simple, 'tis a gift to be free,
'Tis a gift to come down where we ought to be;
And when we find ourselves in the place just right,
It will be in the valley of love and delight.
When true simplicity is gained,
To bow and to bend we shan't be ashamed.
To turn, to turn, it will be out delight,
Til by turning and turning we come round right.
What a joy it was to hear this old Shaker hymn played by the quartet, braving the nippy breeze at the Presidential Inauguration! This particular piece of music means a lot to me. My singing partner Dale and I used to perform it in 1968. Later, in 1996, I sang it over and over to my unborn baby to get her to turn in the womb so she could "come round right." (It worked!)
My eyes teared up many times before, during, and after the Inauguration. I noticed that my tears joined the other tears of the millions of people in the crowd in Washington D.C., and of the millions of people across our land. Not only have we elected a man who I feel has the utmost integrity and love for humankind, but he is a man of color!
I was in elementary school in the 1950's, and I remember when our school in Joplin, MO was integrated. I remember watching on our black and white TV the news of little black children bravely going to school, and being taunted by horrible words and violent threats. Although I was young, I knew how courageous those children were.
My parents had always taught us that all humans were created equal, and the color of one's skin had nothing to to with one's value as a human being. My father owned an automotive parts store in Joplin, and he would frequently go on coffee breaks to a little coffee shop across the street from his store. One day, a black man came in and sat down to get some coffee and a donut. The owner of the coffee shop told him he couldn't sit there; he would give him his coffee and donut to go. My father immediately got up, leaving his food at the counter, and he said, "If you won't serve this man at the counter, then you will not serve me either. I will never be back." He never returned.
My older sister Mary got a job as a waitress at a little cafe on Main Street. She was so excited; it was her very first job. She practiced at home carrying armloads of plates, carefully balancing them so she could learn to bring the food out to her customers. The rest of the family went on a vacation to Colorado, leaving Mary in Joplin so she could work. When we returned home, we were shocked to find that Mary had been fired after only a few days on the job. Why? A black customer had come in and sat down, and she served him. The manager told her to give the customer his food in a sack, and she refused.
When I met Dale, my singing partner, we hit it off immediately. We started singing together at a party we both happened to be at, and we thrilled to the beautiful harmonies we were able to make together. It was like we were on the same wave length. Working out pieces to perform together was so easy! One thing led to another, and soon we were dating as well as singing together. Dale was a very handsome, tall, slender black man with a beautiful voice. The movie "Guess Who's Coming to Dinner" about a bi-racial couple came out about that time, and we relished that we mirrored the plot of the movie somewhat as I took Dale home to meet my parents. I knew that my parents would welcome him with open arms, and they did. Some of my other relatives would not. I had heard some of the racial jokes and slurs coming from some of my aunts and uncles and cousins. But I didn't let any of their comments (or potential comments) bother me. I loved Dale. We made beautiful music together. That was all that mattered. Dale's family was likewise gracious in welcoming me.
Our break-up came not because of racial issues, but other little things that come up when a couple becomes close. Dale decided he wanted to date some other women. While he was trying out some other relationships, I met a man and fell head-over-heels in love with him. The new man became my husband. During the eleven months that I dated Dale, I came to feel a deep committment to the Civil Rights Movement. Dale had trouble finding apartments because of his color. In Parsons, Kansas, where he was completing an internship as a music therapist, he had to bribe the landlady by offering her double the amount she usually got for the apartment! A nosy neighbor noticed Dale coming and going from my apartment in Pittsburg, and complained to my landlady, thinking she had rented to a black man. I had to move.
So, last Tuesday, when our country accepted an African-American as President, I cried! I cried for all the people like my father and sister who stood up for what was right. I cried for all the people who refused to step to the back of the bus, and who courageously went to school despite the taunts and danger. I cried for people like Dale who had to pay twice the going rate for an apartment just because of the color of his skin. I cried for the innocent people who lost their lives, like the four little girls in the church in Burmingham, Alabama, and Medgar Evers, and Martin Luther King. I know that the fight for true civil rights is not over; there are still a lot of angry people who still don't "get it," that we are all children of God, and as children of God, we are all brothers and sisters. But when I saw the millions of people in Washington with tears streaming down their faces, smiling and waving, I knew that the tide has turned.
One song that I sang many times over the years is "We Shall Overcome." and we can now sing, "We Have Overcome."
Sunday, January 11, 2009
So Many Changes!
It has been six days since my "awakening" to the acceptance of my true energetic being, and my knowing the true source of all healing, yet it feels like several weeks have passed! I want to fill in some of the thoughts, conversations, and books that have contributed to the conversion.
The Baglady's Guide to Elegant Living: Learn to Love the Life You Have
My friend Dina Dove wrote this delightful little jewel, and published it last year. I had read parts of it in manuscript form, but I bought the book on Christmas evening and read the whole thing during my fast. It is a "self-help" book disguised as a story, which makes it easy to read and understand. While none of the concepts in the book were new to me, reading them in the context of the story reminded me of some of the basic truths by which I wish to live my life, starting with the knowledge that I am a beloved Child of God, and my thoughts are the source of my reality. A new affirmative song came from reading this book:
I am a beloved, beloved child of God,
And I manifest perfect health.
I am a beloved, beloved child of God,
And I am now in perfect health!
(You can add other things you wish to manifest in your life, such as "abundant wealth," "joy and happiness," "loving friends," etc. The first time I state that I manifest, and the second time I state it in the present tense, because I already have it in my thoughts.)
The AIM Program of Energetic Balancing
I mentioned this program when I first started this blog. It is explained in the book, Sanctuary,
by Stephen Lewis, and you can find out more about it on: www.energeticmatrix.com.
I signed up for this program last April in hopes I could get rid of the lump in my breast through balancing my frequencies. That didn't happen for me. However, the facilitator I work with spoke with me on the phone recently, and her words were extremely helpful.
She spoke of the cancer as a wonderful gift. It offers me an opportunity to come to a new understanding of myself and my true vibrational nature. Here are some additional things she mentioned:
--We are taught from birth that we are only a bundle of flesh and bones, and it is difficult to truly believe that we are spiritual beings in a physical manifestation.
--As spiritual beings, we vibrate at frequencies. It is at this vibrational level that healing takes place.
--When we go to a doctor to be healed, we give away our power.
--There is an emotional and mental component to disease, especially cancer.
--Sometimes the disease has been healed on the spiritual level, but we are still holding on to the mental and/or emotional.
--Many cancers have to do with unresolved anger. (I think mine is connected to my resentment and anger toward my brother. This is something I must release!)
--I am being given the opportunity to focus on my self right now--another gift of the cancer.
The Teachings of Abraham, through Esther and Jerry Hicks
Two dear friends in Joplin have been studying the Abraham material for many years, and they have a study group that meets once a week. Each week we listen to some of the channeled material from Abraham, and discuss it, following with an exercise from the book, Ask and It Is Given: Learning to Manifest Your Desires. The Abraham material is about the "law of attraction." (The movie "The Secret" also presents these ideas. The sequel to The Secret will be shown in movie theatres all over the country this Thursday. Check with your local theatre to see if they are showing it.) Again, the concepts are not new to me: I started years ago working with the channeled material that came through Edgar Cayce, and also read all the Jane Roberts books channeled by Seth, but until now, I didn't fully understand or embrace these concepts. I feel that now I am ready.
I really like the exercise we did at the last meeting. We imagine that we are the head of a huge company, employing thousands of people, all of whom want to do their jobs in an excellent way. We have a manager who takes care of all the details, and this manager is extremely efficient. If we want to have something done, we simply ask the manager to make sure it is done, and we know that it will be completed satisfactorily. We then wrote messages to our managers.
I wrote to my manager: "Please arrange a clean-up crew to clear away any unnecessary or unhealthy cells in my body, and remove them safely from my body." I now can imagine little people with bulldozers working away in my body, moving the cancer cells out, and I release all the worry from my mind, knowing that my manager will be sure to supervise the job and get it done!
I highly recommend this book (Ask and it is Given: Learning to Manifest Your Desires) if you feel ready to consider a whole new way of relating to reality. Abraham is actually a composite of spiritual entities (a "collective consciousness") which speak through Esther Hicks. As I read this book, I feel like I have come home!
Nancy Stenn, Lucid Healing
About a month ago my husband attended a chiropractic seminar in St. Louis, and while there he met Nancy Stenn, who is a healer. He gave me her card, and I called her over the holidays, but it wasn't until last Thursday that she returned my call. The timing was perfect! I had had the session with Chad, the practitioner of The Reconnection work of Eric Pearl the day before, and everything Nancy said resonnated with me on a soul level. She corroborated everything that I had experienced, and she gave me some affirmations to work with until we can get together for a session. As most psychic healers, she can work long distance, but I felt that I wanted to meet her in person, so I am planning to drive to St. Louis next week.
I am feeling very joyful and full of hope, knowing that all these people are supporting and loving me. I am so very grateful for everyone: healers, family, friends, and storytellers whom I have only met on the internet! Add to those the people at Silent Unity who are praying for me constantly. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
The Baglady's Guide to Elegant Living: Learn to Love the Life You Have
My friend Dina Dove wrote this delightful little jewel, and published it last year. I had read parts of it in manuscript form, but I bought the book on Christmas evening and read the whole thing during my fast. It is a "self-help" book disguised as a story, which makes it easy to read and understand. While none of the concepts in the book were new to me, reading them in the context of the story reminded me of some of the basic truths by which I wish to live my life, starting with the knowledge that I am a beloved Child of God, and my thoughts are the source of my reality. A new affirmative song came from reading this book:
I am a beloved, beloved child of God,
And I manifest perfect health.
I am a beloved, beloved child of God,
And I am now in perfect health!
(You can add other things you wish to manifest in your life, such as "abundant wealth," "joy and happiness," "loving friends," etc. The first time I state that I manifest, and the second time I state it in the present tense, because I already have it in my thoughts.)
The AIM Program of Energetic Balancing
I mentioned this program when I first started this blog. It is explained in the book, Sanctuary,
by Stephen Lewis, and you can find out more about it on: www.energeticmatrix.com.
I signed up for this program last April in hopes I could get rid of the lump in my breast through balancing my frequencies. That didn't happen for me. However, the facilitator I work with spoke with me on the phone recently, and her words were extremely helpful.
She spoke of the cancer as a wonderful gift. It offers me an opportunity to come to a new understanding of myself and my true vibrational nature. Here are some additional things she mentioned:
--We are taught from birth that we are only a bundle of flesh and bones, and it is difficult to truly believe that we are spiritual beings in a physical manifestation.
--As spiritual beings, we vibrate at frequencies. It is at this vibrational level that healing takes place.
--When we go to a doctor to be healed, we give away our power.
--There is an emotional and mental component to disease, especially cancer.
--Sometimes the disease has been healed on the spiritual level, but we are still holding on to the mental and/or emotional.
--Many cancers have to do with unresolved anger. (I think mine is connected to my resentment and anger toward my brother. This is something I must release!)
--I am being given the opportunity to focus on my self right now--another gift of the cancer.
The Teachings of Abraham, through Esther and Jerry Hicks
Two dear friends in Joplin have been studying the Abraham material for many years, and they have a study group that meets once a week. Each week we listen to some of the channeled material from Abraham, and discuss it, following with an exercise from the book, Ask and It Is Given: Learning to Manifest Your Desires. The Abraham material is about the "law of attraction." (The movie "The Secret" also presents these ideas. The sequel to The Secret will be shown in movie theatres all over the country this Thursday. Check with your local theatre to see if they are showing it.) Again, the concepts are not new to me: I started years ago working with the channeled material that came through Edgar Cayce, and also read all the Jane Roberts books channeled by Seth, but until now, I didn't fully understand or embrace these concepts. I feel that now I am ready.
I really like the exercise we did at the last meeting. We imagine that we are the head of a huge company, employing thousands of people, all of whom want to do their jobs in an excellent way. We have a manager who takes care of all the details, and this manager is extremely efficient. If we want to have something done, we simply ask the manager to make sure it is done, and we know that it will be completed satisfactorily. We then wrote messages to our managers.
I wrote to my manager: "Please arrange a clean-up crew to clear away any unnecessary or unhealthy cells in my body, and remove them safely from my body." I now can imagine little people with bulldozers working away in my body, moving the cancer cells out, and I release all the worry from my mind, knowing that my manager will be sure to supervise the job and get it done!
I highly recommend this book (Ask and it is Given: Learning to Manifest Your Desires) if you feel ready to consider a whole new way of relating to reality. Abraham is actually a composite of spiritual entities (a "collective consciousness") which speak through Esther Hicks. As I read this book, I feel like I have come home!
Nancy Stenn, Lucid Healing
About a month ago my husband attended a chiropractic seminar in St. Louis, and while there he met Nancy Stenn, who is a healer. He gave me her card, and I called her over the holidays, but it wasn't until last Thursday that she returned my call. The timing was perfect! I had had the session with Chad, the practitioner of The Reconnection work of Eric Pearl the day before, and everything Nancy said resonnated with me on a soul level. She corroborated everything that I had experienced, and she gave me some affirmations to work with until we can get together for a session. As most psychic healers, she can work long distance, but I felt that I wanted to meet her in person, so I am planning to drive to St. Louis next week.
I am feeling very joyful and full of hope, knowing that all these people are supporting and loving me. I am so very grateful for everyone: healers, family, friends, and storytellers whom I have only met on the internet! Add to those the people at Silent Unity who are praying for me constantly. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Thursday, January 8, 2009
The Reconnection: I believe in Miracles!
A major shift has occurred in my consciousness and in my body. I have come to the realization that I have been searching for a substance or technique outside of myself that will heal or cure the cancer. So far I have been rather frustrated that the magic substance had not made itself known yet. Even auto urine therapy, which I have believed in for about 17 years, and which saved my life in a dramatic way, didn't appear to be "working" for me.
I had started reading The Reconnection: Heal Others, Heal Yourself by Dr. Eric Pearl (Hay House, Inc., 2001) about a year ago, but other things intervened, and the book had ended up on the bottom of a pile of books that I intended to read some day. The last day of my fast, I dug it out and continued reading it. It was mostly because of this book that I woke up in the middle of the night and realized that I didn't NEED to do a urine fast (or any other unnatural "treatment" for that matter) in order to heal my cancer. I simply need to reconnect to the core of my energetic being; to KNOW that I am capable of healing any physical ailment.
Dr. Pearl approaches healing completely differently than traditional, or even alternative medicine. It is difficult to explain what he has developed in a few short sentences. If you are interested, I recommend you look at his web site: www.TheReconnection.com.
I will quote a short passage from the last chapter of the book: "What I've come to recognize is that this is healing in a very different sense than what we have been taught to perceive, understand, or even believe or accept. This healing is about an evolutionary process brought into existence through co-creation at the highest vibrational interaction with the Universe." (p. 220)
I located a practitioner of Reconnection work in Springfield, MO, only an hour's drive from me, and set up an appointment for yesterday morning. During the session I didn't notice anything monumental--no lights or visions, no vibrations zinging around in my body, but I felt very relaxed, and went into a deep meditative state. The idea with receiving the energy is to expect nothing--just to be open to whatever happens. I did not expect a spontaneous remission of the cancer--I really didn't know what to expect.
On the way home I felt very happy and relaxed. The hour drive seemed to take only 30 minutes--before I knew it I was home. The rest of that day I also felt good, with lots of energy. That night (last night) I had two very powerful dreams:
In one, I am in a big older house, searching for something or someone--not sure what I'm looking for. Then I find it (and I know it is what I've been searching for when I see it). It is in an empty room, propped up against a corner, and it is a tiny little man with no arms or legs--actually it is shaped not like a man, but like a peanut or bacteria (a huge bacteria!), and he has a beautiful charming grin on his face. I am ecstatic to find this little man, and recognize him (it?) immediately. "Oh, here you are," I exclaim. "I've been looking all over for you!" The little being grins and "nods" (kind of hard without a real head), and I feel very happy.
I woke up after this dream, feeling like I had found my "innate intelligence" or my core being. After going back to sleep, I had another dream. I don't remember all the dream, but in it I am stating over and over: "I believe in miracles!" I say it in English and in Spanish! "I really do believe in miracles!" Again, I awoke feeling ecstatic.
This feeling of well-being and joy continued throughout the day, along with clarity of mind and lots of energy.
I hadn't finished reading the whole book, and turned to the last chapter this evening. I read these words by Eric Pearl: "In this book, we've discussed healing as discovery, healing as theory, and healing as practice. But in closing, there's one aspect I want to emphasize: healing as miracle. By "miracle," I mean exactly that--a wondrous event manifesting a supernatural act of God."
I BELIEVE IN MIRACLES! CREO EN LOS MILAGROS.
I am not going to stop all the nutritional support I have been taking--I need to support my physical body during this healing, but I do feel that I have made a deep connection with that part of me from where my true healing comes!
I had started reading The Reconnection: Heal Others, Heal Yourself by Dr. Eric Pearl (Hay House, Inc., 2001) about a year ago, but other things intervened, and the book had ended up on the bottom of a pile of books that I intended to read some day. The last day of my fast, I dug it out and continued reading it. It was mostly because of this book that I woke up in the middle of the night and realized that I didn't NEED to do a urine fast (or any other unnatural "treatment" for that matter) in order to heal my cancer. I simply need to reconnect to the core of my energetic being; to KNOW that I am capable of healing any physical ailment.
Dr. Pearl approaches healing completely differently than traditional, or even alternative medicine. It is difficult to explain what he has developed in a few short sentences. If you are interested, I recommend you look at his web site: www.TheReconnection.com.
I will quote a short passage from the last chapter of the book: "What I've come to recognize is that this is healing in a very different sense than what we have been taught to perceive, understand, or even believe or accept. This healing is about an evolutionary process brought into existence through co-creation at the highest vibrational interaction with the Universe." (p. 220)
I located a practitioner of Reconnection work in Springfield, MO, only an hour's drive from me, and set up an appointment for yesterday morning. During the session I didn't notice anything monumental--no lights or visions, no vibrations zinging around in my body, but I felt very relaxed, and went into a deep meditative state. The idea with receiving the energy is to expect nothing--just to be open to whatever happens. I did not expect a spontaneous remission of the cancer--I really didn't know what to expect.
On the way home I felt very happy and relaxed. The hour drive seemed to take only 30 minutes--before I knew it I was home. The rest of that day I also felt good, with lots of energy. That night (last night) I had two very powerful dreams:
In one, I am in a big older house, searching for something or someone--not sure what I'm looking for. Then I find it (and I know it is what I've been searching for when I see it). It is in an empty room, propped up against a corner, and it is a tiny little man with no arms or legs--actually it is shaped not like a man, but like a peanut or bacteria (a huge bacteria!), and he has a beautiful charming grin on his face. I am ecstatic to find this little man, and recognize him (it?) immediately. "Oh, here you are," I exclaim. "I've been looking all over for you!" The little being grins and "nods" (kind of hard without a real head), and I feel very happy.
I woke up after this dream, feeling like I had found my "innate intelligence" or my core being. After going back to sleep, I had another dream. I don't remember all the dream, but in it I am stating over and over: "I believe in miracles!" I say it in English and in Spanish! "I really do believe in miracles!" Again, I awoke feeling ecstatic.
This feeling of well-being and joy continued throughout the day, along with clarity of mind and lots of energy.
I hadn't finished reading the whole book, and turned to the last chapter this evening. I read these words by Eric Pearl: "In this book, we've discussed healing as discovery, healing as theory, and healing as practice. But in closing, there's one aspect I want to emphasize: healing as miracle. By "miracle," I mean exactly that--a wondrous event manifesting a supernatural act of God."
I BELIEVE IN MIRACLES! CREO EN LOS MILAGROS.
I am not going to stop all the nutritional support I have been taking--I need to support my physical body during this healing, but I do feel that I have made a deep connection with that part of me from where my true healing comes!
Monday, January 5, 2009
Day eleven: end of fast
Yesterday (day ten of the fast) I felt grouchy, weak, and shaky. Last night I awoke around 3 AM, having had a dream that I can't remember now, but I had the strong feeling that it was time to break the fast. I have not realized the results I had hoped for (the lumps disappearing), but I felt a little alarmed by the racing of my heart in the middle of the night when it should be resting and by my weight loss. Yesterday I was down to 113, and later in the evening 114 (probably from the water I was drinking--been drinking a LOT of water!) I dozed a bit after that, but couldn't really sleep.
John was awake by 5 AM, and I told him of my decision, and he agreed that it was probably the right one. He got up and cooked some delicious red lentil soup; I stayed in bed and dozed some more, but I could smell the aroma in my sleep, and it felt so good to know that I would soon be eating some!
I drank some Jason Winters tea when I got up around 8:30, and took my selenium and iron supplements, as well as an immune boosting supplement I had been taking before the fast. Then I sat down with a hot bowl of the lentil soup.
AHHH! I've never tasted anything so good! John had spiced it with Indian spices, including a lot of tumeric. It was the perfect thing to break the fast. He warned me not to go too fast--just eat a little, then eat a little more later, etc. I could feel the warmth and nourishment of the soup go throughout my whole body.
After eating I went in the sauna and rubbed aged urine all over my body (again--have been doing this ritual morning and evening since starting the fast), then came in and put the infrared heat lamp on my breast while I read in bed. Then I showered to wash off the old urine smell and dressed. I feel SO much better! I have some energy again. I ate some more soup, and after about an hour ate some more!
I'm planning to eat very simply now, eating only low glycemic index foods which hopefully won't feed the cancer cells. I'll have to do a little research to plan this diet, but I know I want lots of greens, and no refined carbohydrates. More on the diet later.
For now, I am just so happy to be eating again! Maybe I should have stuck with it a few more days, but I was feeling so miserable, I think this is the right decision.
John was awake by 5 AM, and I told him of my decision, and he agreed that it was probably the right one. He got up and cooked some delicious red lentil soup; I stayed in bed and dozed some more, but I could smell the aroma in my sleep, and it felt so good to know that I would soon be eating some!
I drank some Jason Winters tea when I got up around 8:30, and took my selenium and iron supplements, as well as an immune boosting supplement I had been taking before the fast. Then I sat down with a hot bowl of the lentil soup.
AHHH! I've never tasted anything so good! John had spiced it with Indian spices, including a lot of tumeric. It was the perfect thing to break the fast. He warned me not to go too fast--just eat a little, then eat a little more later, etc. I could feel the warmth and nourishment of the soup go throughout my whole body.
After eating I went in the sauna and rubbed aged urine all over my body (again--have been doing this ritual morning and evening since starting the fast), then came in and put the infrared heat lamp on my breast while I read in bed. Then I showered to wash off the old urine smell and dressed. I feel SO much better! I have some energy again. I ate some more soup, and after about an hour ate some more!
I'm planning to eat very simply now, eating only low glycemic index foods which hopefully won't feed the cancer cells. I'll have to do a little research to plan this diet, but I know I want lots of greens, and no refined carbohydrates. More on the diet later.
For now, I am just so happy to be eating again! Maybe I should have stuck with it a few more days, but I was feeling so miserable, I think this is the right decision.
Saturday, January 3, 2009
Day nine of the fast
I almost gave up the fast yesterday morning. I had a dream in which I saw a bowl of a delicious-looking dish made of salmon eggs and noodles, all mixed in together. I started eating it before I realized that I wasn't supposed to be eating. I said, "Oh no! I'm supposed to be on a fast." Then I said to the person who provided the food, "Well, I guess I just broke my fast." Then I laughed. When I woke up, I told my husband John about the dream, and said maybe that was an indication that I should start eating again. But he said, "I think you should stick with the fast. You've already gone through the worst part of it, and as long as your weight doesn't drop down too low, you should continue."
Then I thought about what the dream might mean, other than breaking the fast. The salmon eggs were larger than normal caviar eggs, and the noodles were also of a rather strange consistency. When I feel the breast tumor, I now feel little nodules--kind of like the fish eggs in my dream. I think the noodle/egg dish I was eating is the cancer!
One theory about how the fast works on cancer is that cancer cells demand glucose to grow and survive. On a total fast, no glucose is being provided, so the cancer cells die. Also, without glucose being provided for fuel, the body begins to consume its reserves, beginning with muscle at first, then fat. The body goes into "ketosis" at that point. Although I have no scientific evidence to show that the body would "eat" the cancer cells, I am working with that image in my visualizations. The dream gave me a very clear visual image to work with; it makes me feel good to think that I am "eating up my cancer."
I don't feel as hungry today as before, even with John cooking up one of my very favorite foods last night, curried red lentils. I enjoyed the smells, but they didn't drive me as crazy as the smells did a couple of days ago. Still, I prefer to stay away from people eating.
My friend Kyla gave me a wonderful massage again yesterday. I think massage is essential when on a fast. After the massage I did five minutes of "vibing" with the VIBE machine. Then my friend Ree and her two girls and my daughter Veronica and I went to see the movie Marley and Me--a real tear jerker, but very enjoyable.
This morning I was going to go to Kyla's yoga class, but didn't get ready in time, so I did yoga at home--a very slow and easy yoga session done to beautiful music. It felt so good to stretch and move!
Essential things to do while on a fast:
get a good massage often
do easy yoga every day
spend some time with good friends and laugh a lot
meditate
cuddle with your spouse and children
pay attention to your dreams
read uplifting books
watch feel-good movies
pet your pets
stay warm (the sauna is great!)
spend time with plants--either house plants or outdoors
spend time sitting in the sunlight
Things to avoid when on a fast:
being around people who are eating
watching TV, especially commercial TV stations
stressful situations
getting chilled
strenuous exercise
driving
Then I thought about what the dream might mean, other than breaking the fast. The salmon eggs were larger than normal caviar eggs, and the noodles were also of a rather strange consistency. When I feel the breast tumor, I now feel little nodules--kind of like the fish eggs in my dream. I think the noodle/egg dish I was eating is the cancer!
One theory about how the fast works on cancer is that cancer cells demand glucose to grow and survive. On a total fast, no glucose is being provided, so the cancer cells die. Also, without glucose being provided for fuel, the body begins to consume its reserves, beginning with muscle at first, then fat. The body goes into "ketosis" at that point. Although I have no scientific evidence to show that the body would "eat" the cancer cells, I am working with that image in my visualizations. The dream gave me a very clear visual image to work with; it makes me feel good to think that I am "eating up my cancer."
I don't feel as hungry today as before, even with John cooking up one of my very favorite foods last night, curried red lentils. I enjoyed the smells, but they didn't drive me as crazy as the smells did a couple of days ago. Still, I prefer to stay away from people eating.
My friend Kyla gave me a wonderful massage again yesterday. I think massage is essential when on a fast. After the massage I did five minutes of "vibing" with the VIBE machine. Then my friend Ree and her two girls and my daughter Veronica and I went to see the movie Marley and Me--a real tear jerker, but very enjoyable.
This morning I was going to go to Kyla's yoga class, but didn't get ready in time, so I did yoga at home--a very slow and easy yoga session done to beautiful music. It felt so good to stretch and move!
Essential things to do while on a fast:
get a good massage often
do easy yoga every day
spend some time with good friends and laugh a lot
meditate
cuddle with your spouse and children
pay attention to your dreams
read uplifting books
watch feel-good movies
pet your pets
stay warm (the sauna is great!)
spend time with plants--either house plants or outdoors
spend time sitting in the sunlight
Things to avoid when on a fast:
being around people who are eating
watching TV, especially commercial TV stations
stressful situations
getting chilled
strenuous exercise
driving
Thursday, January 1, 2009
Update, day seven of the fast
I never thought I could fast this long, but here I am!
When my husband and I were in India sixteen years ago for the first all-India conference on urine therapy in Goa, we met a urine therapist, Kuzum Kapur, who had used the urine fasting method (very successfully) with some of her clients. She said, "this is not an easy therapy." I'm finding that she was right!
I had been told that after the first three days of a total fast you don't get hungry any more. I'm not finding that to be the case! Night before last we went to some friends' house to play scrabble, and they made some food. I felt ravenously hungry on smelling the food! Last night we had a few friends over for New Year's eve, and the same thing happened. I find myself craving certain foods! Watching television is impossible--all the food ads, designed to make people want to go out and buy the food, are too effective! I dream of the day when I can eat normally again.
John (my husband) and I discussed this problem this morning, and we decided that I should not be drinking the ounce of wheat grass juice that I had been taking in the morning--that might be contributing to the hunger. So now I'm drinking only water and urine, plus taking a selenium supplement, organic germanium, and iron. I also stopped drinking the Jason Winters tea. The hunger seems to be better today after making this change.
I lost a lot of weight at first and was very concerned about that. If I continued losing weight at the rate I was, I'd soon be down to a dangerous weight and would have to stop the fast. However, from yesterday to today I've stayed at the same weight: 116. That is 14 pounds lower than my "ideal weight."
Good news! I had been measuring the lump on my breast all along, and it had remained about the same size until last evening when I measured: it has shrunk about 1/2 inch (around the periphery). That raised my spirits, because with all the vitamin C and other cancer-killing herbs and alkaline water, I had not noticed any change at all! It appears there is some progress.
When my husband and I were in India sixteen years ago for the first all-India conference on urine therapy in Goa, we met a urine therapist, Kuzum Kapur, who had used the urine fasting method (very successfully) with some of her clients. She said, "this is not an easy therapy." I'm finding that she was right!
I had been told that after the first three days of a total fast you don't get hungry any more. I'm not finding that to be the case! Night before last we went to some friends' house to play scrabble, and they made some food. I felt ravenously hungry on smelling the food! Last night we had a few friends over for New Year's eve, and the same thing happened. I find myself craving certain foods! Watching television is impossible--all the food ads, designed to make people want to go out and buy the food, are too effective! I dream of the day when I can eat normally again.
John (my husband) and I discussed this problem this morning, and we decided that I should not be drinking the ounce of wheat grass juice that I had been taking in the morning--that might be contributing to the hunger. So now I'm drinking only water and urine, plus taking a selenium supplement, organic germanium, and iron. I also stopped drinking the Jason Winters tea. The hunger seems to be better today after making this change.
I lost a lot of weight at first and was very concerned about that. If I continued losing weight at the rate I was, I'd soon be down to a dangerous weight and would have to stop the fast. However, from yesterday to today I've stayed at the same weight: 116. That is 14 pounds lower than my "ideal weight."
Good news! I had been measuring the lump on my breast all along, and it had remained about the same size until last evening when I measured: it has shrunk about 1/2 inch (around the periphery). That raised my spirits, because with all the vitamin C and other cancer-killing herbs and alkaline water, I had not noticed any change at all! It appears there is some progress.
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